is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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