The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
