You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I intend to get homeless drunk
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
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I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
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Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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