i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
