Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
