On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize