I accidentally had phone sex last night
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
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