Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.