youre lurking in front of me
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
