he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
