i don't like sucking hair
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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