Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
this must be what syphilis tastes like
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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