Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize