We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
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