so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
