Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
