no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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