i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
