handjob tips. give me some.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
