Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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