Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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