Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
what day is it and did you see me today?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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