If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
