you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
