dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
false alarm. still invincible.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
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I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
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Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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