he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
