Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
