I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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