WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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