talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
