Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
