yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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