office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Randomize
