This house was built for laser tag.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize