I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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