thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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