I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize