She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize