After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize