Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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