ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
