my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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