I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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