I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize