I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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