it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
