i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
My legs feel like baby dolphins
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The adults are the big ones right?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
