Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Fuck appropriateness.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Holy sore nipples Batman
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
