definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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