wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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