I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
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Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
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My breasts were aching with rage.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
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